Glibbertysmidgeon

This weekend I went for a 30 mile bike ride up the West side of Manhattan to the George Washington Bridge.

Seth led James and I on a nice, flat spin along the Hudson, and to a stop at Dinosaur for a lunch of killer barbecue. Kris stayed home with the baby. I felt a bit bad about enjoying all that exercise and good food while he was stuck at home, so I ordered him a big plate of pulled pork, and stuffed it into my fanny pack.

When I got home, I grabbed a shower and took over parent duty for a few hours until Scarlett went to bed, and then I took a book into the tub for a long soak and a read.

I haven’t felt so relaxed in months.

On Monday, my mind felt remarkably clear, and I had a great attitude. I was able to get all of my tasks done and even whip up a pan of lasagne for dinner.

I know that I’m feeling good, at least in part, because Scarlett is getting over her ear infection, and is sleeping at night again. Part of it is because I’m getting over my sinus infection, and I’m sleeping again.

But it still seems like a couple hours in the saddle have done more good for my state of mind than 4 weeks of Zoloft.

It’s good to be back.

Welcome to summer.

The first weekend in June, and it was 90 degrees today. After a visit to the park with Sophie, Kris, Scarlett and I had a nice brunch with friends and retreated to our air-conditioned living room to sweat out the humid day.

Late in the afternoon when the day had cooled, we had another little stroll in the park.

The rolling lawns of the Long Meadow were dotted with park blankets and barbecues. Frisbees criscross the air, and music from a sound stage under construction competed with the squeals of the children.

They had nearly finished putting up the movie screen when we left to come home and put Scarlett to bed.

Today is the beginning of the summer season at the park.
They’re playing Close Encounters of the Third Kind in the long meadow tonight, and the concerts at the band shell will begin running one or two a week.

At nine o’clock, the fireworks began. The blasts were so close the windows rattled, and I could feel the vibration in the floor.
Normally, I like fireworks, but tonight I”m listening with my mommy ears. All I could think was,

“Can’t they use quieter fireworks?”

I hurried to check on the baby, and was relieved to find that our loud new air purifier muffled the ear splitting cracks to dull thuds in Scarlett’s room.

After I was sure she was safe and happy sleeping through the storm, I couldn’t help thinking about how stressful small things like firetrucks, fireworks, and smoking neighbors have become. Then I imagined how it would feel if those crashes outside our windows were bombs instead of fireworks.

I’m seeing a lot of things differently since Scarlett came into my life.

“Wouldn’t it be horrible to have a baby and be in Iraq?” I said to Kris,feeling ill.

“It would be horrible to be in Iraq, period” he answered.

He’s right, of course.
Anyone with half a brain knows it’s bad in Iraq right now.

But it’s hard to feel it, in the midst of our busy, comfy lives with our hot running water and our convenience stores. It’s hard to empathize with people living in fear halfway around the world when American Idol is on.

My Mommy Eyes had given me a moment of that empathy.

It happens a lot these days.